RTN Exclusive: 3MM Illegal Voters!

This application is the brainchild of Gregg Philips of VoteStand. A board member of True The Vote, a right-wing organization dedicated to fighting Voting Fraud, he claims to have a database of over three million illegal voters. Presumably collected by his application shown above.

Although he has refused to let the mainstream media see his data-set, we were able to convince him to let us have a look at it by appearing in NerdHerd uniforms when he called his local Buy More for tech support. What we saw was an absolute blockbuster.

The Data

The VoteStand data is stored on a 1991 Intel 286 computer running LOTUS NOTES. This may explain the time period necessary to "cleanse" it. It was broken down into several categories of offense (ballot stuffing, voter fraud, and vote tampering) with fields for the specific offense type and information on the race of the offender and the reporter.

Our specialist said that the data was collected from several hundred cell phones and (it appeared) call-in reports. Some were accompanied by video pictures which were stored in the Apple Cloud and were mixed with CELEBRITY NUDES.


Although we were not able to get the full scope of the data, we were able to see some of the primary features. These are some of the extracts using our Big Data engine:

By Racial factor, black people were the most likely to be cited for voting fraud due to GANG COLORS, SAGGING PANTS, and the apparently suspicious 'BLACK POLL-WORKER' condition.

Less common for blacks were "EYEING ME" and "DREAD LOCKS." Several black women were reported for "VOTING THEIR GENDER."

For the 'Brown' (Latino?) offenders, the major categories of offense were DID NOT LOOK AMERICAN and SPOKE SPANISH. Less common was allegations of ballot-stuffing with the CAR FULL OF ILLEGALS report.

For white offenders, tampering was the most common report: WOMAN USING COMPUTER was apparently suspicious but also YOUNG WOMAN POLL WORKER was a common report.

For Race-By-Offense, with scaled values, Brown people were by far the most accused of Voter Fraud while whites were reported only for Tampering and Stuffing.

You can see here that DID NOT LOOK AMERICAN and SPOKE SPANISH are the two major factors in VoteStand reporting by a large margin--although SAGGING PANTS is another primary reason for a report.

Our Conclusions

Our scientific data analysis suggests that VoteStand users were (a) almost all White Males (at least 60-40) and (b) were probably self-selected racists to have downloaded the app in the first place.