Image of Kellyanne Conway Devouring Fly Captivates Internet
A high speed photo of White House spokeswoman Kellyanne Conway appearing to extend an elongated tongue to trap and devour a fly has captivated the Internet's conspiracy theorists. Researchers previously devoted to #pizzagate, 9/11 Building 7 investigations, and reporting into who killed O.J. Simpson's wife, turned their attention to the photograph circulating through Reddit and 4chan.
Said redditor DeplorableAl: "I think it's clear that Kellyanne Conway might, if the photo is true, be a kind of superior human-being--one with advantages only presently seen elsewhere in nature."
Other fans admired her newly weathered and even 'gaunt' appearance.
"She's lost some weight," said RedPillWing, a Voat member. "It looks good. I mean, people are saying it looks like she's wearing a 'skin-suit'--but you know, if Trump told me to wear a skin suit of someone, I'd do it. Hell, who wouldn't?"
Others, however, were not so sure.
A man giving his name only as Claymore, wearing all black with a black blaclava, an 880.00 USD leather jacket, and an Anarchist 'A' flair-pin, said "We think Conway has become one of the lizard people--they've been among us for years, wearing our skin, eating our children, and driving up income inequality in order to hold down the minimum wage."
"I think whoever is in that outfit skinned Kellyanne and is now capering about pretending to be human."
He then broke off to urinate on a parked limousine screaming "Power to the pee-ple" as he voided his bladder.
The photographer who originated the photo, however, claimed it was a fake using photoshop that had been taken all too seriously.
"I mean, really," said Harold Hoffman of Hawkins Indiana, "it was just two seconds and a badly cropped picture of a fly. I don't know how people aren't seeing that--it doesn't even look like its properly coming out of her mouth . . ."
When asked if there was anyone who had seen through his deception, Hoffman was confused. "Well, like, everybody I know," he said. "I mean, I don't know--how could you believe it? Do people really believe in lizard-people or is that just like the flat-earth thing. I'm so depressed."
Attempts to question Conway went unanswered, however this reporter watched her retreat from a press conference, move quietly to the back of the room, and unhinge her jaw after which she efficently devoured Washington Post reporter David Weigel in one fluid motion.