A group of deep-thinking high principled conservative intellectuals embarked on a brave examination of the 2016 election--seeking a definitive answer to the question "What gave us Trump." These brave men are some of the foremost thinkers in the conservative space. They represent the Republican's party's best chance at understanding the election that surprised so many.
This is a partial transcript of the event recorded by a RealTrueNews observer who was allowed access to the proceedings.
INT - Westchester Holiday Inn Express Garbanzo Conference Room
Five stalwart, intelligent patriots sit on worn chairs on the stained carpet. They look TIRED and TENSE.
I’m pretty sure it was when they attacked our freedom of speech? Right? All that college-campus stuff?
I don’t know. I don’t know. Most GOP voters were never accosted on a college campus. Could that really be the case?
Does it matter? It was in the news. Especially on Fox. What about the RIGHT TO BEAR ARMS?
It was when they attacked us for our CHRISTIAN BELIEFS.
Yes! Right! The Indiana Pizza Place! That was a BIG ATTACK.
Right--it was a MEDIA HIT JOB. Who orders pizza for a GAY WEDDING.
They also made EQUAL RIGHTS equal to FEMINISM.
[ EVERYBODY SHUDDERS ]
That gave us TRUMP! The SUPREME COURT voted over the AMERICAN PEOPLE and gave us GAY MARRIAGE!
I’m pretty sure that was JUSTICE KENNEDY.
RICK gives him a HARSH GLARE.
For me it was the SECOND AMENDMENT. After SANDY HOOK they TRIED TO TAKE OUR GUNS.
[ EVERYONE NODS ]
That gave us TRUMP.
DAVID HILLER: Wait, did they pass anything after Sandy Hook?
BOB: Twenty Three EXECUTIVE ORDERS.
[ EVERYBODY SHUDDERS ]
I’m not sure anyone ACTUALLY DIED in Sandy Hook. Maybe it was A PLOT?
Like #pizzagate. What if Sandy Hook was like that?
You’re watching too much INFO WARS, Rick.
I saw it on a CBS ATLANTA station. It’s REAL.
It’s not real. It’s fake news.
Oh yeah? Well Obama’s EXECUTIVE ORDERS did ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to GUNS. But he outlawed saying MERRY CHRISTMAS. That’s an ATTACK ON THE FAITH.
He didn’t. Rick, that Didn’t HAPPEN.
Wait--Wait--those EXECUTIVE ORDERS were just a PRELUDE. They HATE OUR GUNS!
[ Everybody Nods ]
They HATE CHRISTIANITY more! [ Becomes ANGRY ]
Fellows--I think we can ALL AGREE they call us RACIST and XENOPHOBIC for NO REASON. [ tries to calm group ]
They did. It’s TRUE--there was NO REASON. Obama’s birth certificate had NINE LAYERS. Who BELIEVED THAT?
[ Everybody LAUGHS ]
That was because of the optical scanner--it wasn’t--
Are you saying it was FAKE NEWS?
I--No, just that--
Why do you hate America, Noah?? Is it because you’re JEWISH?
You have to be joking.
He’s TOTALLY SERIOUS. Why are you telling JEWISH LIES, NOAH. Is SOROS PAYING YOU?
Let’s calm down, everyone.
Yeah, guys, geeze. [ Stands abruptly ] I gotta get some ai--